Say it Ain't So

Living in the southern part of the United States can be an interesting experience. For starters, one can never tell what to wear because the weather is so fickle. Rain today, sunshine tomorrow. Cold snap ends on Friday and starts again on Monday. One day my wardrobe consisted of three seasons: a winter coat, a light spring jacket, and a summer frock. All in one day. Totally weird.

But what's even more weird (in a good way) are the people from the South. Well, weird is not the word that I want to use, unique is probably a better word choice. And speaking of words, are you familiar with the language spoken "down south" by many of its inhabitants? Neither was I until I moved here.

Remember the actors Chris Tucker and Jackie Chan in the movie Rush Hour? Chris says to Jackie, "Do you understand the words coming out of my mouth?" And I'm thinking, you gotta be kidding! You're asking a Chinese immigrant if he understand the words coming from your mouth; a high-pitched, screeching southern drawl riddled with split infinitives and dangling modifiers. I don't even understand the words coming out of your mouth, and I was born in America. Chris Tucker was born in Georgia (a southern state) and has the accent to prove it.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not knocking southern accents. I'm just amazed at what comes out of the mouth of some southerners. I'm originally from Chicago but I was raised in the pacific northwest where folks don't have an accent and you really can't tell what region they're from. They call it the "every man's" voice. This is the voice used by broadcast journalists, radio personalities, and advertisers. I've been accused of having this type of voice--and I'm just one generation removed from the south. However, I did study journalism, even if only for two semesters.

Just listen to the local news anchors here in the south and you won't hear their southern accent, especially the one's who were born and raised here. Then listen to some of the folks they interview; you'll definitely know what part of the country you're in.

Here are a few buzz words and phrases to let you know you're probably living in the south or from the south:

1. Fixin' To get set to; be on the verge.
2. Make groceries To buy groceries; grocery shop.
3. What time it is? What time is it?
4. Reckon. To regard or think of as.
5. Sho 'Nuff. Sure enough.
6 That dog won't hunt. The idea or argument won't work.
7. Holler. To yell or shout.
8. Y'all. You all or ye all.
9. Hear tell. A form of "hear it told." Often conveys that the information was passed second- hand.
10. Nearabout. Almost
11. Wongo. Want to go.
12. Mo'. More.
13. I'ma. I am.
14. Dubba wide. Double wide.
15. Sumptin' Teet. Someting to eat.
16. Hoodia. Who do you . . .
17. Liked to. I could have.
18. I ain't never in my life. I have never.
19. Mama ' n em. Family.
20. Mo'. More.