Okey Dokey Friday Jokey

The Lie Detector

John was a salesman's delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmick. His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get him to change. One day John came home with another one of his unusual purchases.

It was a robot that John claimed was actually a lie detector.

It was about 5:30 that afternoon when Tommy, their 11 year-old son, returned home from school. Tommy was over two hours late.

"Where have you been? Why are you over two hours late getting home?" asked John.

"Several of us went to the library to work on an extra credit project," said Tommy.

The robot then walked around the table and slapped Tommy, knocking him completely out of his chair.

"Son," said John, "this robot is a lie detector. Now tell us where you really were after school."

"We went to Bobby's house and watched a movie," said Tommy.

"What did you watch?" asked Marsha. "The Ten Commandments.," answered Tommy.

The robot went around to Tommy and once again slapped him, knocking him off his chair once more. With his lip quivering, Tommy got up, sat down and said, "I am sorry I lied. We really watched a tape called Sex Queen."

"I am ashamed of you, son," said John. "When I was your age, I never lied to my parents." The robot then walked around to John and delivered a whack that nearly knocked him out of his chair.

Marsha doubled over in laughter, almost in tears and said, "Boy, did you ever ask for that one! You can't be too mad with Tommy. After all, he is your son"

With that the robot immediately walked around to Marsha and knocked her out of her chair.

The Dream Realized?

Democratic Presidential Nominee, Sen. Barack Obama (IL) and wife, Michelle.

"It would be fatal for the nation to overlook the urgency of the moment. This sweltering summer of the Negro's legitimate discontent will not pass until there is an invigorating autumn of freedom and equality. Nineteen sixty-three is not an end, but a beginning. Those who hope that the Negro needed to blow off steam and will now be content will have a rude awakening if the nation returns to business as usual."

"Now is the time to lift our nation from the quicksand of racial injustice to the solid rock of brotherhood. Now is the time to make justice a reality for all of God's children."

"But there is something that I must say to my people, who stand on the warm threshold which leads into the palace of justice: In the process of gaining our rightful place, we must not be guilty of wrongful deeds. Let us not seek to satisfy our thirst for freedom by drinking from the cup of bitterness and hatred. We must forever conduct our struggle on the high plane of dignity and discipline. We must not allow our creative protest to degenerate into physical violence. Again and again, we must rise to the majestic heights of meeting physical force with soul force."

- Excerpts from Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.'s "I Have a Dream" speech during the March on Washington (August 28, 1963)
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Liberation from Guilt

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!

Today is my birthday and I declare it a national holiday, a holiday free from guilt. So, I'm gonna indulge in a sinful pleasure. I'm gonna have a hot fudge ice-cream sundae topped with fresh whipped cream, crushed peanuts, and a plump red delicious strawberry on top.

Okay. Okay. I'm dieting, so I'll skip the cherry. Help me blow out 44 candles. Ready. Set. Go!

Happy Birthday to Me!!!

What the Eff? Kids Gone Wild!

What would possess a parent (and I use the word loosely) to allow a child to smoke a cigarette? I don't care what culture you're from or how "acceptable" it is for some cultures to allow smoking or drinking at an early age. It's irresponsible behavior. Letting a child inhale carcinogenic poison is akin to placing a baby in a car seat in the middle of a busy highway. It's just a matter of time before it's smashed to pieces.

I'm sure you have seen these pictures ad nauseum on the Internet, but stuff like this is happening everyday. It's totally wild and crazy.

And then you got the kid in the video below. What gives?



Maybe little man's grand momma should sign up for a course in ass whupping at the Ass Whupping Academy featured in the video below. Concerning Lil' Hector/Tokyo with the cigarette, his parents should be whupped.

Catch You on the Rebound

I've been incredibly busy for the last few days and it looks like there's no end in sight. Well, actually, the end is in sight but it's not until the end of next week. I'm juggling several huge projects at the same time, so I'm stretched pretty thin. But I haven't forgotten my blogging duties (hee hee), I'm just mad busy. Give me another week and I promise, I'll make it up to you.

In the meantime (to quote Iyanla Vanzant), grab a cup of java, sit back, relax and stay for a while. Read a few posts, gather your thoughts and drop me a line. Feel free to share your comments or just leave a note to let me know you dropped by.

May your day be filled with wonder, peace, love, and joy.

In Peace,

Literate Muse

Okey Dokey Friday Jokey

IRISH PROSTITUTE

An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her return, her Father cussed her.

"Where have ye been all this time? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old Mother through?"

The girl, crying, replied "Sniff, sniff . . . Dad . . . I became a prostitute."

"'Ye what?!! Out of here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to this Catholic family."

"OK, Dad-- as ye wish. I just came back to give mum this luxurious fur coat, title deed to a 10-bedroom mansion plus a £5 million savings certificate. For me little brother, this gold Rolex. And for ye Daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes limited edition convertible that's parked outside plus a membership to the country club ........... (takes a breath)............ and an invitation for ye all to spend New Year's Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera and . . ."

"Now what was it ye said ye had become?" says Dad.

Girl, crying again, "Sniff, sniff . . . a prostitute, Daddy! Sniff, sniff."

"Oh! Be Jesus! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a Protestant. Come here and give yer old Dad a hug."

What I Know For Sure

Laughing is good therapy.

No matter what, at the end of the day you can't recapture lost time.

What goes around comes around and usually it ain't pretty when it's your turn.

What you do to others reflects on you. What you do for others reflects on God.

My occupation does not define me.

The older I get the more I appreciate my youth.

How you handle a break-up says a lot about your character.

I love the sound of happiness.

It takes two to be a couple.

My position in the community does not define me.

Whether I speak or "write" my peace, I have released tons of energy.

What proceeds from the mouth of a man/woman comes from the heart.

Thoughts without action are only daydreams.

To attract friends you must be friendly.

To attract love you must be loving.

To attract fools you must be foolish . . . in your thoughts, actions or deeds.

Jeremiah 29:11: For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.